Today is one of those days where I've walked around sighing a lot. And crying. Sighing and crying.
It was the last day of my estate sale, and while I am happy to be rid of all that extraneous stuff, it also made me sad. Sad to see things go that have been in my family for my whole life, or even longer. Yes, I know I couldn't keep everything. Yes, there was a lot of stuff that was just "stuff"--no sentimental value. But there were a lot of things that I loved too.
In fact most of the stuff didn't sell. Things I would have expected people to snatch up were left over. I wanted to snatch it back--but I didn't. A reseller came in and took the lot. I watched the ornate white wrought iron bird cage that safely held my canaries go. And the vintage yellow kitchen cart that came from a friend's mother. And my blue willow china from when I got married.
I picked out a couple of things to keep: the kitchen stool we had way back when we lived in Dallas, and I took with me to Baylor for my first apartment; a typing table from Wade College back in the day. I used to type catalog cards on it almost everyday. A duck decoy from my dad's study.
I thought I'd feel relieved when the house was cleared out. I probably will...next week. Right now I just feel sad and alone. So alone.